ABOUT "APPROVAL" OR "DISAPPROVAL"

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.

ABOUT "APPROVAL" OR "DISAPPROVAL" (of society, family, friends).

WE ARE DISCUSSING SUCH AN IMPORTANT ISSUE, WITH DEEP PSYCHOLOGICAL ROOTS!

RASA,

 I AM GLAD THAT YOU DO NOT PUT ANY SIGNIFICANCE ON MY APPROVAL OR DISAPPROVAL. YOU DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU ANDONLY YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS...................A FRIEND

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.

Letter to a Friend,       

         

I have learned so much, even recently.

 

I had a model I loved – call him Franklyn.  Like many models he told me his life story.  I try and sift through to understand the dynamics / psychology therein.  Franklyn had something on his mind that troubled him. There were several things, but this really caught my eye.

          To start out, like most ghetto people – (poverty class) he had a miserable life.  His father came into some fortune through the music business and  took off for adventures with luxury and whores.  The Mother/wife was helpless and family struggled.  Of course he lost it all, came back and fam said Frank should take him in but Frank threw him out because of his drunkenness.

          What is your goal, Franklyn?  I asked.  He said,

          “To make up for the shame and unrighteousness of my Dad, to be a better man, to help my family.”

          Did he achieve success, Franklyn, did he begin to get success and take one step toward his goal?  On the contrary, he sunk lower and lower, no matter how much I tried to help him in his career, until he ended up a gay porno star, a slave therein forever, because once you are in it it’s like an addiction – you need money, you spend it, you go back do more gay porno, you are dependent on it for money until there is nothing left of you.  And like his Dad, Franklyn has a MONEY, SELF ESTEEM PROBLEM.  As soon as it’s in his hands, it’s gone, so gone is the hope of anything but failure.

          This is the preamble to get to one certain point.

          Franklyn told me about his college days.  He was a basketball star, but listen.  He said,

          “I loved SKATE BOARDING.  But my Dad discouraged it.  He told me IT WOULD GET ME NOWHERE, that I HAD TO PLAY BASKETBALL.  He hounded and hounded me until I finally gave in, quit skateboarding, practiced basketball and became good at it...........................”

          Why did he not get a regular job after college?  He HATED sitting at a desk, he needed physical work.  OK, that I can understand.

          I wondered, if Franklyn had continued his heart’s desire, he would have had some kind of emotional release, but he listened to his Dad, a drunken failure for himself and family, the last person one should take advice from.  But Dad – for Franklyn – preached / pressured the world’s ways– a bar that he himself could not/would not grasp, but bullied Franklyn to do it; the conventional path of basketball VS skateboarding.  How did this affect Franklyn psychologically?

          When we do something for the approval of others it means we have put them above ourselves, above our heart, our deep psychological need. They are more important than ourselves, we are saying.  This is bullying us not to follow our Inner Voice but the collective voices of other.

          However, no one understands the logic of the heart, which we feel but seldom understand; it speaks from our Inner Self.

          What would have happened had Franklyn continued skateboarding, shelved the college basketball?  His college did him no good anyway.  I believe the college as well as basketball stunted his emotions, he felt less true to himself, but true to society and the man who had failed at being a husband and father.

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.

 

          About me – had I listened to the world there would have been no female body building and all it’s female empowerment, there would have been no “Stripping for God” and the movie of my life.  My message of Fatima would not have been preached in front of the White House;   the cold war might have led to World War III, with nations being annihilated – but I want to talk about someone else.

 

          I have a young man I love named Jeff, who wants to marry me.  He is not mature, has some growing to do, but what can one expect when you’re 21?

          He is having some effort adjusting to the love he feels for me, coming to terms with how to act upon it, how to merge with me while separating from the standards of society which say that being with me is inappropriate– and he’s encouraged to forfeit me for someone his age.  There will be pressure, ridicule, criticism from all sides.  This is daunting for a young person, takes courage to do the unconventional thing.

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.

 

          I cannot rush his development, his adjustment, his growth, I am waiting.  But just days ago I saw his personal page on the web, and there was a link.  I followed it.  The caption for his link was,

         

          “THIS IS WHERE MY HEART IS.”

 

          What was the link?  I knew Jeff was good at sports, but did not know about this.  It is SKATEBOARDING.  The link has a picture of him doing a champion leap over a six foot barrier.

 

          He did his other sports while in high school and college, with teammates but this is solo, so he can keep doing it – but for some reason, he isn’t.

         

          I do not get to talk to Jeff easily because even though we are in love and by God, we will be married, we do not speak by internet or phone.  His approach/avoid conflict keeps us where I only see him at the clubs downtown and an occasional date.

 

          But when I do see Jeff and get a chance to talk to him, I will say,

          “What happened to your skate boarding?  Don’t you think you would feel better if you went back to it?”

 

          Indeed, it serves no useful purpose, does not put money in his pocket, does not add credentials on a resume; it’s just for himself.  Like the love we have for each other – it serves no “wordly” purpose but positive energy, love, emotion. But the Universe / God know the reason and purpose of everything.

 

Guru Rasa Von Werder.....10  22  14     

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.

 

"RASA VON WERDER IS NOW WORKING ON A BOOK CALLED "AMERICA'S MOST BEAUTIFUL MEN."  JEFF MICHELANGELO WILL BE THE COVER.