10-11-22      ARNOLD means SUCCESS-2 dreams 

Dreams of the last 2 days explain clearly that when Nick died he left his earthly gf / drug parter, & appeared with me - & he is in Heaven.  She is miserable, I am happy

 

It’s probably about Nick but let’s see.

        I am some place not completely happy, a visitor but been given accommodations.  They gave me my ‘brother’s’ room as he’s away.  My bed is small, the long way to the left, against the wall, green cover, single bed.  To the right of me there might be 1 or 2 more small beds for other students but I don’t see them there right now.

 

*** {ROOM 1 BED:  This is me downtown where all the students hung out.  I am SINGLE in that I have no love interest or serious boyfriend.

        WASHING MY HAIR:  Hair is thoughts, feelings, intellect, brain.  I am being CLEANSED it seems.  Don’t somehow want to inconvenience others or hurt anyone while this is happening.} ***

 

        Later in the dream a strange item is that I decide to wash my hair right on top of his bed.  It has about 3 layers of blankets; I pour the water right over my hair onto the blankets thinking

“Why am I doing this?  The water will seep into the mattress!”

I then check the blankets, but fortunately, only they are wet, the mattress was spared.  I take the blankets & must dry them before I quit this room so as to not make discomfort for whoever owns this place.  I go to this hall where they have ‘dryers’ of sorts, but the dryers are unusual.  They are BAGS, soft nice ones, not too big.  Since I have 3 blankets the bags are not big enough for all, I must put them one in each bag.

 

*** {SOFT BAGS FOR DRYING:  BAGS usually represent ‘got a new bag’ meaning ‘got a new shtick’ or ‘thing that pleases me.’

So this is about setting things right, being pleased.  This might have to do with picking up partners downtown, boyfriends, the partying or romance scene going downtown, everyone seeking something like pleasure, fun & partners.

The SOFT BAG is an excellent symbol for VAGINA. These bags are PENIS HOLDERS, lol.  And some of them are PINK so you know what that means.  So it’s like saying

“What does my vagina want?  What kind of penis or man?”

I was trying to sort myself out with the hair washing.  So it means I am asking myself & trying to figure out what do I want?  What kind of man?  Do I want sex? - All the details that go with this.   

The other females were ahead of me also, sorting themselves out.  The LINGERIE alludes to SEX & the CONQUEST OF SEX or flirtation, being attractive, finding guys to want them.

This might be saying that there was no serious DAMAGE or problem in my sorting out what my ‘bag’ or preferences are, it worked out OK, I didn’t hurt anyone or put inconveniences on them.} *** 

I open one bag & it has some dried clothes in it belonging to one of the students – this is like a college’ of sorts, with student housing – what I’m a part of.

I take out the clothes of this female student, which seem to be lingerie, put them aside & put my blanket in.  The same with the second bag, also has clothes of another girl, I hope they don’t mind, I just put them in a pile to the right.  I don’t recall the third blanket but probably the same idea.

Now they were getting read to PARTY.  At the end of this hall there’s a large room, they were preparing & gathering to meet there, lots of guys want to go there – not only students but full-grown, tall, well developed, attractive guys, all want to drink & meet females.

I am ‘sort of’ invited, however, there is a different standard for me than them – I’m not one of them, an ‘outsider’ because I am different, older I guess.

So I am concerned to how I look, I must look VERY GOOD so as not to be criticized or looked down upon, I am working on this & do not see myself entering that party scene just yet.

 

*** {DIFFERENT STANDARD:  Indeed I was 63 years old when I started going to the bars / clubs. I had to take extra effort to look good, outstanding, at that age.  Some young girls don’t have to do much to look their best.} ***

 

But I do see some outside guys, good looking, coming into the hallway & seeking that room – I point it out to them.

As I’m in the middle of trying to look good, out of the clear blue sky ARNOLD SHOWS UP!  And he has come, SOMEHOW, for me!

 

*** {ARNOLD is Nick.  He was AMAZING.  And he wanted me, loved me.} ***

 

I mean, with Arnold on my arm, the SKY is the LIMIT!  I can walk in anywhere & become a celebrity.  He’s like THE KING.

He’s in the best shape of his life – his peak of muscularity.  He’s wearing a cut-out t-shirt with the shoulders & arms completely exposed.

 

*** {PEAK, BEST SHAPE OF HIS LIFE, and MUSCULARITY:  This does not actually represent MUSCLES, it’s his MASCULINITY, beauty, sex appeal & charm.  When I met him he was at his peak at age 19 & remained there for quite some time.} ***

 

I am wearing something that exposes my body & breasts, kind of like he is, I am.  And we walk into that party space CONFIDENTLY & everyone TAKES NOTE & knows they MUST accept me now!

It was the most wonderful feeling.  There was no longer any doubt or fear on my part re being accepted, once he accepted me, I was ‘in.’ I see him caring about me, us embracing, being close.  He did ask about where the party was – I led him there, also told him where I was staying in my bro’s room as he was away – the room they gave me – at the same time hoping he wouldn’t just think I was saying,

“I have a room for sex,”

That it was all about that, a lower level, me trying to seduce him, it was higher than that.

 

*** {HE’S THE KING, GREAT FEELING, I AM ACCEPTED:  This gives a ROSY picture of how it was, minus the bad parts.  It says I SUCCEEDED in getting the GREATEST GUY DOWNTOWN.  In terms of what I mentioned, he was.  According to this, they knew it although he tried not to show it most of the time. And that made me Queen to his King.  So, I am seen important or gain status by having him.} *** 

Time goes by & there is a ‘lull’ or space.  One day again, I am putting on my clothes.  My body is PERFECT.  I PUT ON MY FAVE UNDERWEARS WHICH WILL NOW BE OUTERWEARS.  They are the super stretch soft undies I got from the hospital – I collected a dozen.  But this one is ripped.  At first I was going to wear it then said don’t be lazy, change it & I did.

The top is also revealing, just like last time I saw Arnold & then HE SHOWS UP.

In his terrific outfit like last time – showing his body – we are both dressed just like last time, he’s full of life & enthusiasm & I feel like I’m on top of the mountain.

 

*** {NEW PLACE:  This is the Other Side of the ‘veil’ - The spiritual world. He is in spirit, I can communicate with him.

We are in a NEW PLACE, far from where we were.

I see a map like what I saw where Napoleon was, & on top of this country are 3 other countries, Russia, Germany to the right & maybe Austria.  And Arnold exclaims,

“While we’re here, let’s make a go of Russia!  Meaning, we are close, let’s explore Russia,”

But I say,

“Oh, but I don’t have a PASSPORT! And can’t get one!”

That stops that.

 

*** {RUSSIA:  This is part of HEAVEN.  Don’t know why except it is Grandma’s country so part of my ROOTS.  Our roots are Heaven.

Saying I don’t have a PASSPORT is saying I can’t ascend into Heaven because I am still on earth.  Can’t do it – get the passport – until I die.} ***

Can’t recall what else.  Just that both of us are completely HAPPY & SATISFIED, as we FULFILL EACH OTHER.  It’s a feeling of perfect love & PEACE, all that you can imagine that is happiness between a man & woman!  It was not just a spiritual sensation, I felt his BODY & MINE touching, caressing, being close. I have been to the other side & physical sensations are as real as on earth.} ***

 

 

 

10-10-22Male Sits by Me-I am Content-Another Female is Distraught

 

Dream Explains my Happiness with Nick, - he is with me – While she is distraught as she has lost him

 

I know it’s about Nick & the other female is his ex-drug partner, gf,  Ruth Anne.

I’m in a place sitting at a short counter, myself & a young male, we are opposite the counter on stools, the counter is behind us, we might be leaning on it.

At first we were really close, now it seems we might be 2’ apart because somehow we didn’t want to show publicly that we are a couple or that we’re ‘close.’

He’s wearing a shiny short black jacket & something warm underneath.  Then he disappears & I worry he might not return, but indeed he does.

It might be at first we were almost touching, but now a slight distance but still close. There is this sort of ‘understanding’ or agreement that we are together but not making a big show of it.

His outfit has a change & I say to him,

“Oh, you got warm?”

Because at first he was wearing something warmer, but now he put on a thin-material summer shirt, which has a green print design with little green splashes all over it.  I don’t see the entire shirt, only the front, as his jacket is over it.

Then a nosy parker female appears behind him from the door there & sits down & asks us are we together or something like that.  Meaning are we boyfriend & girlfriend?

I feel it’s not of her business, we want to be private, & I say something like,

“I take the 5^th.”

I speak so quietly it’s almost a WHISPER.

 

Now behind us is a short well-lit hallway is a female standing that has on a light blue summer blouse & she is distraught.  She has anxiety.

There is a statement here, my calm demeanor with the male sitting to my right, & her standing by herself distraught.

 

*** {ME CALM, HE BY MY SIDE, SHE ALONE, DISTRAUGHT:  This is the difference between myself & Ruth Anne following Nick’s death.  She has lost him, she’s ALONE but I am not alone, he is with me.  I am satisfied, she is bereft or mourning his loss.

The COUNTER is probably the BARS.  The bars or going downtown is behind us – finished. I stopped going, he id dead.

He’s wearing the shiny black jacket – looks vinyl, to show DEATH or a MYSTERY – something people wouldn’t see or understand.  The two outfits might be first, when he & I were together in the flesh, it was COLDER or he was emotionally colder.

But then he DIES & appears with me, he is WARMER, more ALIVE, his LOVE for me is greater as he is not fettered by all the distractions, ignorance, confusion of the people in his life & the drugs they shared.  He is FREE to see & FEEL the Truth of our love.

Who is the female that appears through the door asking if we are together?

This is most likely Ruth Anne also – as what other female would care or think about it?  And in the hallway I see her misery.

Why am I so quiet, private, speak in a whisper?

Because no one, including she, sees my relationship with Nick – we are in the Spirit world.  But she does get some sense or suspicion of it.

The door she gets through is closer to Nick than to me – she’s behind him but he’s not looking at her or talking to her, he’s with me.  She I think SUSPECTS we are together mentally, spiritually.  She hears my whisper which means she has a slight sense of this.

And now it is none of her business. Her time with him is over.} ***