Jesus cries at the thought we might fail with the New Order

 

Jesus wants us to succeed with our

Matriarchal Order so much that He cries at the thought of us Failing 

Marius-Grandma-moving-Dance show with evil female manager-Man owner is perplexed & cries  2-25-24

 

         Start with Grandma which usually man the deep unconscious.

         Grandma was living by herself & she didn’t speak English {like my real Grandma.}

         She’s depending on myself & others in the familyto supply her with food for a whole YEAR.  This other person & I {is it my sister?} are now leaving after our yearly visit & Grandma is complaining.  She says,

         “You gave me less than 10 lbs of potatoes!”

         I say,

         “Next time I come over I’ll give you 100 lbs!”

         I survey her predicament.  She doesn’t drive, she doesn’t speak English – like my real GM – old, grey hair in bun, wearing an outfit kind of like my new paisley dresses, tall & thin.

         MEANING:

         *{ME:  Wow, this I don’t have a clue what it means.  If Mother God doesn’t help me, no one will.

         MG:  It is YOU who is taking care of yourself, you have no help.

         This might be you saying, unconsciously, when this one lady & I break up there won’t be anyone I can depend on if I need help.  It portrays you as being ‘helpless’ or ‘without help’ – without a best friend, mate or someone to rely on.

         But you remind yourself, that soon, coming up, you will have resources that are ten times what you have now – which the Saints have told you is coming.

         Potatoes are a MAINSTAY OF LIFE.  You can live on them.  The hermit of 70 years in Siberia, Agafia Lykov, said that her Mom died because one year they didn’t have enough POTATOES & she made sure the kids had enough while she herself starved.

The hundred potatoes coming up next time is all the Saints are telling you the Life Story will be produced & you will have ‘more money than you know what to do with’ & there will be a ‘stampede’ of media wishing to talk to you.  From these resources you won’t be alone it seems.}*   

         The DANCE outfit we rehearsed fro the dream of yesterday – I’m back here -  not one of the dancers but an announcer for them.  It’s kind of ‘Goddess’ Show, & we seem to be in gold or yellow costumes, & I see one that is solid gold sequins like I used to wear.  But when I arrive backstage everything is rather dark at first & I see no one - no dancers.  After a minute I see one, then another female.  Only two – none of the other dancers showed up!

         The audience started out as closed in, in a building.  But when I go out to start the show – {still thinking somehow there will be one with the dancers, that they are perhaps late} I see a large vista like a park, & about a hundred people are sitting out there in a sort of ‘picnic’ ambiance.  They are enjoying this atmosphere plus will see the show.  The setting is casual.  Some seem to be wearing sunglasses, it’s mostly men but there are women, & their seats are facing NOT to the stage but to the 90 degrees to the right of me facing them from the stage.

         OK it’s show time.  The stage is large.  I have the microphone, I go to the front of the stage & begin testing it, speaking. I say this or that, no reaction—can anyone hear me?  I do this a couple times – nothing.  Then I say louder than before,

         “Can you hear me?  Is anyone out there?”

         It also seems as I’m speaking there’s a sort of curtain in front of the stage, long golden fringes that obscure some of my vision {the curtain has not gone up yet}.  At that point a female voice from the audience answers,

         “YES!”

         I see her in a seat facing the stage, apart from the others, her own chair in a light blue outfit, young, thin, maybe 35 yrs old.

         I begin to make a sort of preamble speech but now I find out that the woman from yesterday {the Dance Conflict dream-2-24-24} – who was the manager of this show - where I labeled the owner as ‘Jesus’ – this woman is an evil person.  She is NOT Mother God or Holy Mary as I thought.

         She’s out there sitting on a raised area with the owner to her right, watching to see the progress of HER show & she interjects,

         “They have come to see the show, not your speech.”

         I feel abashed or chastened.  I then change my words & announce,

         “We will now present a show based on the Goddess.”

         BUT & it’s a big but – there is no show.  The women did not arrive – they were 100% unreliable & insincere!

         But two dancers did show up {not from the show} & there is ME.  One f them was taking a shower before work in this dingy, nasty dressing room, I see a cloth that is light grey-blue with small blue flowers on it here & there.

         The lady manager, who I shall call CASSANDRA, calls the whole thing off.  Cancel the show, she says, which is a negative act as if all is lost – no hope – can’t adjust or improvise.

         But the owner is now sitting at a picnic table in sort of the stage area but not the stage - Can’t explain it.  His back is to me, he’s a fairly big man, wearing a grey soft kind of t-shirt with a couple light blue stripes.  He is facing toward the table, forlorn that all is lost.  But I encourage him.  I even put my hand on his back & arm, comforting him – his body is soft.

         I tell him,

         “Look, we have two dancers & there’s me.  I can dance also.  And there’s a hundred people out there, & they will buy drinks.”  {It’s assumed that we can’t charge money for the show as the show that was announced cannot be.  And so the ownership makes no money.}

         He says,

         “How can you?”

         {Meaning dance.}

         I think of the solid gold sequin dress that is here – I can wear that.  And my body is not bad, ditto my dancing ability.  Not sure abut the shoes, that might be a glitch as you must have high heels on stage & not anticipating this, I did not bring mine, but I feel hope.

         The man begins to cry.  He’s crushed - the show meant that much to him.  And it is that bitch of a manager that is closing the show.  I tell him it doesn’t have to be, he is the owner & has authority over her.

         MEANING:

         *{Wow, this is a biggie.  Now we have Our Lord CRYING – that’s a disaster!  I comfort him!  I tell him WE CAN DO IT!  The only place in the bible where Jesus cried – tears of blood – was in the Garden facing his Passion.

         Now what is the show?  Two shows – One where 15 women as seen yesterday, were rehearsed & supposedly could work.  But they are deadbeats. Yesterday they were shown as ‘flat chested’ & the mean evil manager lady said I made them look bad because of my books being large {means love} & fired me!  So I’m not PART of this show, nor did I rehearse, but for some reason, I’m the ANNOUNCER of it.

         This show is all the women in the world & the internet PRETENDING to be ‘Goddesses’ who REPRESENT Mother God, but they DON’T.  They represent their own egos & self- centered-ness. And so when the TIME comes to present to the world the idea of Matriarchy-Mother God they WILL NOT BE THERE!

         As the ANNOUNCER I am the PROPHET of this, but the evil manager {Sounds like Heidi GottNerd—an academic who told me, when I reached out to her – she would NEVER work with me!} wants me to SHUT UP & just let the phonies represent Matriarchy

I was abashed by her attitude but continued my work, did not leave the stage.

When I call out to ‘is anybody out there’ means I’m asking is there anyone SUPPORTING ME & the work.  One woman answers.  This could be Freyja Derrickson who did great things or who else – Someone in the future?

Bitch Heidi is saying no one wants to hear me!  No monologue or speech, just announce THEM & I don’t get mad, I just keep going.

But when the TIME COMES & it is NOW in the dream – None f these women she rehearsed & worked with CAN PERFORM.  They are simply not there – absent!

The man-owner who I see as Jesus is the owner of the IDEA of Matriarchy. His teachings are Maternal, like a Mother who loves all her children.  Jesus said he would RETURN during the time of GLOBAL WARMING & we are experiencing that now – it is getting more extreme year by year.

Now when the type of women Heidi is CANNOT FUNCTION as Matriarchs on the world stage or PRODUCE anything of meaning re this social order – she wants the entire theater or work to SHUT DOWN.  It’s either them or nobody!

Jesus our Lord is extremely TROUBLED by this possible failure, so much so that HE CRIES.  I comfort him saying look, we can manage. The two POOR WOMEN who showed up {they are those who have gone to the School of Suffering as the dingy, nasty dressing room & taking a bath implies} - & myself CAN DO A SHOW & we can get SUPPORT from the public by selling drinks {alcoholic beverages are inebriation or spiritual highs—receiving Grace, we’ll send out Grace.}

The two poor women might be William Bond & Pete Jackson – my associates – who are depicted as female for being MATRIARCHS, no negative quality implied.

And why does Jesus WONDER if I can do this?  Because it is so difficult, so hard, like FACING HIS PASSION & there are only 3 of us!  While out there in the word there are many PRETENDERS to the Throne – but they are deadbeats who showed their true colors.  They talk the talk, can’t walk the walk. They can do everything but produce a Matriarchy!  But I am telling Jesus, we 3 can do this!

And what do I depend on that gives me hope?  That golden dress – it is MY LOVE.  Because ‘love makes all things possible.’

I think my skills/abilities {body, dancing} will SUFFICE.  I’m not bragging to be perfect, mostly relying ON THAT DRESS which is the GREATNESS of my LOVE.  But the HIGH HEELS I’m not sure of.  It means CRUCIFIED.  I want to succeed, but don’t want to be murdered in the process, is that OK? Can I do this without experiencing what Jesus did in His Passion?

Overall this dream is truly great because I comfort Our Lord - & that of itself is a Marvel. This explains that the work we’re doing is His – It means a lot to Him.

IMPORTANT:  this NDE video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5_ZvD51jDw&t=79s

 

Pay attention to how Jesus ENTERED HER BODY at the end of her stay in Heaven.  She asked him if he'd go back with her - he said yes - & then he entered her body.  This is a Jesus Person that can become a person within us.  And so when we dream of Jesus, it could be this very person inside rather than the HISTORICAL one.  We replicate Jesus when we love him totally, "No longer I live but Christ in me."  I now realize that sometimes when I see Jesus in my dreams- Like this one- it is the JESUS PERSON within me! {end}

  

         My sister & I have been somewhere but the time is over & we are leaving.  At first it’s a normal area but then it changes to the room of Marius Bernotas – my Mom’s lover which ended it for Dad– which always means separation, usually end of a relationship.

         My sis has got her bags packed tightly, I have one large bag jammed full also, but there’s one round suitcase I have that I have partially filled & can’t find what else to put in, I just leave it that way & go to take off.  {At one point sis & I had some sort of bad conflict & I was ‘in her face’ but this is vague.} Sis can be one of my own inner personalities or another person.

         This suitcase is the one I had when I left B’klyn & escaped to California at age 16.

         MEANING:

         *{This worried me quite a bit.  But now I’m glad I typed it as I can understand more clearly, it’s probably a lady who has no respect for me – gets angry & explodes on me when I bring up the facts of the past.  Maybe it’s time for us to end it, this says it will end.  I was going to say to her,

         “Hey, when I escaped to CA why did you come after me?  Why did Mom?  Why didn’t you guys leave me alone & allow me to live my life away from you?  It was Mom who abused me & got others to do so & yet – they would not let me live in peace, apart from them, always had to reach out & bother me & stay in touch, & never changed from the contempt they had for me.  I was imagining myself telling this lady why didn’t they just forget me after I went to CA?}*

 

         The lover, friend praying a lot.  There’s a man who’s in love with me & I with him.  I seem to be resting at his place while his friend, another man, hovers about.  The lover goes out, I fell asleep, he must have been gone for an hour but I didn’t even sense the time.  I am in bed, that other friend never leaves, he stands behind me looking on & he’s so innocent I don’t feel invaded even if he watches lover & I in bed.   I ask the man are we going to make love again.  I don’t know who he is but both the men are wearing black clothes, the lover’s middle sticks out like he’s overweight as I see him return from shopping for us.  Both these men are kind & really sincere, I seem to be lollygagging.

         MEANING:

         *{This sounds like a Soul in Purgatory & I am TRANSMITTING Grace to him via the idea of ‘making love.’  His friend most likely is a good guy praying for his soul!

The biggest hint is they’re both wearing black clothes. And ‘making love’ with a man I don’t even know is usually a Soul in Purgatory, giving him Light.}* {end}