Divorce Dad

 

Want to Separate from Dad 3-24-24 

Don't need his Psychological Support any more re Love/Marriage

 

         I’m outside somewhere – wide open skies – some structures like small houses.  A woman is here to the left, my Dad is to the right.

         I ascend, I guess up some stairs but it feels like I’m on air – onto a porch to the front of me in the middle of this area which I described as ‘wide open spaces’ with a foothill to the left, prairies to the right then way beyond, more foothills.  And to the right of this porch is an INVISIBLE HOUSE.

         As I ascend onto this wooden porch the lady to my left is amazed how I look as I am exquisite.  I am incredibly thin - my waist super small.  I have on a red dress & on top of it a coat fastened tightly at the waist, not completely covering the dress.  It’s of a luminous thin stiff shiny material that shines in various hues – just like a jacket I have here.  Both the dress & coat go to my knees or slightly below & I’m wearing super-high heels, at least 4” – spikes.  So I look astounding even to myself, lol.

         I’m on my way somewhere & looking for food before I go where it usually is on the porch.  And I say

         “What, no dog food?”

         I also somehow convey to them both – the lady & Dad – that I want to separate from him.

         He doesn’t want this & he quickly says he’ll get food for me – he goes somewhere & returns with a blue painted wheelbarrow like I used to work with here, & it is filled with a huge amount of beautiful cooked rice – looks delicious.

         But for some reason I disdain this & say no thanks, I’ll eat elsewhere.  Don’t know what I’m thinking but vaguely, will I stop somewhere at a coffee shop for a bite?  It isn’t clear in my mind.

         What is clear is that I’m done with Dad – as if he’s my husband & I tell them both I WANT A DIVORCE!

         I ASK Dad if he’ll give me one & he said he doesn’t know about that.

         I don’t know why I ever married him.  He’s old – looks exactly like the years I last saw him, not attractive at all, late 60’s early 70’s. 

         And there’s a very young man near me standing there now & I cup his face, he’s the beautiful Puerto Rican ‘Buck’ I used to date when I was 29 – he was 19.  And he smiles at me sweetly.  And I tell them I have him, why should I stay with Dad?

 

         Earlier there was a similar situation. This guy is with a female but he doesn’t love her.  He wants to get away from her & he does & he comes to me & lies in my arms.  I see the top of his head, thick straight black hair, & I caress his hair.  He tells me he loves me.  And I’m very happy as it looked to outward appearances he was with that other lady.

         MEANING:

         *{ME:  Mother God, I sense this is about Nick & me being together, united as husband & wife & during my struggles to achieve this union, my Dad appeared often in dreams as the ‘man who gives away his daughter,’ – which means he is joined with his daughter & has her to give.

         And it seems I’m saying, for one thing,

“OK, I have succeeded.  He is mine now forever {Nick}.  So I wish to split from Dad, no point in having him united to me.  Am I right so far?

         MG: Indeed you are.  Nick is represented by two men in the dream, Buck & the other guy.  The’ other guy’ put on a big show of being with his drug enabling partner but he loved you, not her & he admits it here.

         ME:  OK but there are many other symbols – the pastoral scene, the porch with an invisible house, asking about dog food, Dad tries to placate me with a whole lot of cooked rice – the way I look.  I’m not getting what these mean.

         MG:  The way you look.  You’ve been dieting 9 months & are looking good, perfect in fact, except in real life you want to lose even 10 more pounds.  Your appearance says you have suffered but through this you have gained your goal – the goal was to have Nick, & you did it.

         The invisible house is that you don’t have him on earth, to live with him, it’s cyberspace or the mystical realm – it’s not of this world, people can’t see it.  But this is the perfection of the relationship.  The red dress is suffering & the blue is depression or sorrow, two things you partook of during the whole time of your relationship.  And the super high heels are it was a Cross – a big or tall one.

         The lady who’s impressed is me, your Mother God.

         Why wide open spaces as described with a great panorama, view?  It’s Heavenly.  Your relationship is now in Heaven but you’re still on earth so it’s both dimensions but you have achieved your goal. You even impressed yourself.

         What is Dad upset about that he doesn’t want to divorce you & what is the barrow of cooked rice he presents?

         This is more or less the temptation to stay attached to Dad as your security – that he’ll feed you emotionally – which is what’s supposed to happen on earth.  You want to end this attachment & you are going to, so you disdain the food or nourishment he presents although it’s a lot & seems good.

         You will find sustenance elsewhere- good bye Dad, your role is fulfilled I must leave.

         It’s like a child that rebels against parents to find their own way.  This is a psychological separation & it’s a good one.

You are free from the torture of his abandoning you as a child, the memory of it must be healed & it has.  You can feel it. 

 ME:  Why do I ask about DOG food?

MG:  Yesterday you listened to a meaningful story by Ernest Thomson Seton about his dog Bingo, how they were united & how loyal & faithful Bingo was & even saved his life.  You were like that to your Dad.  So you are the dog, referring to food for you.}*   (end)