the Role of Men—Mosuos vs Us--Part 3  3-3-24

The article on Mosuos is from Wikipedia

 

Matrilineality[edit source]

Except the women and men who are loss in Mosuo society or separation, otherwise they will usually know who their father is through casual conversations with hints from family and neighbors. When a baby turns one year old, the mother and sister of the father will visit, bringing gifts. On major festivals, children visit their father's house. Fathers are not responsible for disciplining nor for providing for their children. Instead, they are expected to discipline and provide for their sisters' children and to be close to their nephews' biological children. Therefore, the Mosuo people "know their father but are not close to their father"………………

         Rasa says:

         This even casual acquaintance with the Fathers will not be the NORM in our Order but there will be exceptions.  The NORM will be the female will have multiple partners & the paternity of the Dad cannot be proven except by a test.  However, some of the males she cohabited with might be random if she does not meet them under our auspices, & even if she does meet the guy at our dance/gatherings or by some sort of introduction where we know him he might be gone out of our reach – he might not be in touch with us.

         We of the Order don’t CARE re paternity as the Order is the other parent – the male is a sperm donor in the majority of cases. 

         Our situation is also completely different than the Mosuos.  The Mosuos families have males & females & when the females in a family have children, her brothers & Uncle have something to do with raising them.  This will not happen with us as our male presence is marginal.  There will be men attached to certain Members but they have no leadership or responsibility.  There maybe be volunteers or friends of the Order who work on computers, attend gatherings, & even become Members of our Religion, but they will have no involvement with the kids in our community except in cases where they are the spouse of a Member & it’s their kids, & the wife chooses for him to be involved.  {If she prefers to handle the kids without his involvement & he takes her to court he will be removed from our community—in this Order the female rules her family – the male follows her will.

         The social order of the Mosuos is different than that in America to be sure.  They trace their roots back a thousand years in isolation & inbreeding, having ties with everyone in their tribe.  Of 40k people there is no crime to speak of – no violence, rapes or murder reported or punished.  Everyone is known & furthermore, there isn’t incentive for crime as there are no homeless, marginalized or downtrodden members of society – people are not driven mad by desperate circumstances, & everyone is known so you would not get away with crime.  True, there could be the mentally ill – people can be born or driven there even in a good environment & supported by their neighbors & family – but so far I’ve read nothing about crime among the Mosuos.

Wikipedia Talk:  "The Mosuo are alone among their neighbors to have a guardian mother goddess rather than a patron warrior god" (Mathieu, 2003)."

         Not so with Americans.  We are a crime laden society, the men we’re dealing with are not the Mosuos. We must be on the alert & defense ahead of time lest we fall into abusive or criminal hands.  {Not saying women are without fault, the women in our Order will be selected with great alacrity.} And for both genders, physical violence is not the only thing to be avoided – there is mental & emotional abuse – we’ll watch out for that in anyone who wants to be a part of us.

         To those who say we’re being too strict against men.  It’s our choice; this is the way the Order is composed. If people don’t want to join they don’t have to, but it’s Safe Harbor for those that do.   Indeed, not all snakes are bad, but to eliminate them all removes the bad ones – lol. You can go on & on about most men are good, why the paranoia – there’s the whole big world for you to stay in – our Order does not have to be your choice!  For the women who agree with us, this is for them.  If they don’t agree with us – take their chances outside, no one is forcing anyone.

         We spoke before re dance gatherings. These will be the focal point of ‘fraternizing with the enemy’ lol.  Indeed, heterosexual women don’t want to be cooped up with other women 24/7 – or be isolated from men full time.  The dance-gatherings are where we pre-select men to eliminate anyone that is OBVIOUSLY unsuitable {jail records for violence, theft, child abuse, drug dealing, etc}.  We cannot easily identity psychopaths, sociopaths & narcissists – but eventually, such characters will show their true colors.  With that in mind, we give the men that pass a TEMPORARY invite to the gatherings - & eventually, when females get to now them they will complain & their invites will be withdrawn.

         Besides dances & Holiday parties there will be separate Religious Services for the men {on the same premises of the gatherings, not the Temple reserved for women} – those that believe can receive the Sacraments from a qualified Priestess same as the Catholic Church:  Baptism, in the name of the Mother, the Creation & the Holy Spirit, Confession {reconciliation with God} where the individual repents of sin & is absolved by the Priestess.  There is the Holy Mass, there’s the Sacramental Nuptials, there’s Extreme Unction with Holy Viaticum when in danger of death. We will take seriously the sincere men who believe, are fed up with patriarchal religion, & want to throw their spiritual destinies in with us.  {end Rasa part}

 

Matriarch[edit source]

The matriarch (Ah mi, or elder female, in Chinese) is the head of the house. The Ah mi has absolute power;^[10] she decides the fate of all those living under her roof. In walking marriages, Mosuo women are responsible for much of the work done around the house and financial decisions. The matriarch also manages the money and jobs of each family member.^[12] When the Ah mi wishes to pass her duties on to the next generation, she will give this female successor the keys to the household storage,^[10] signifying the passing on of property rights and responsibility.

         Rasa says:

         For us, the Matriarchs are the Officers & Elders, & these will have keys to various rooms such as storage of food, anything valuable & private, as well as offices where records of the Order are kept.  Not all these persons will have all the keys, for instance, only the Officers designated to take care of records will have keys to that, while those responsible for any type of supplies;  the food & herbs, alcohol, medicines, household goods, baby needs, etc. all under lock & key.

Officers will have keys to all private dwellings - In hotels, motels, the owners have keys to all rooms.  If the individuals wish to be private they have chains & deadlocks.  The Officers will have the right to INSPECT the private residences for anything against the rules or to check on any suspicions such as theft, or to check on the welfare of Members or their children.  Children can never be left alone under the age of 8, nor pets in a house without water & food, for any length of time.

    There will be a superb child-care facility. Toddlers will have a designated surrogate Mother if & when the Mom is working or going out.  She could go away for a week-end or vacation & her baby will be cared for.  Not only physical but emotional needs of children are paramount.  The have to be held, close to someone for security, answered when they cry - all that is important.  Studies show that physical closeness is as important or even more important than food.  In tests of ‘Harlow’s monkeys’ {cruel tests--they tortured the little monkeys unto death--too typical of a male leader} baby monkeys were given the choice of a cloth-covered bottle to cling to or food & the cloth-covered bottle came first.  When MEN took over orphanages in America they ordered the nurses NOT to pick up the babies except for feeding & diapers – all the babies died!

           Signs a child may have abandonment issues include:

·                            Clinging or separation anxiety.

·                            Worrying or panic.

·                            Fear of being alone.

·                            Getting sick more often due to stress.

·                            Difficulty concentrating.

• About attachment disorder from Wikipedia, re the Romanian orphan children:

Because of the neglect the children suffered, many grew up with physical and mental delays. Children with obvious mental delays or disorders were given false diagnoses from untrained nurses or doctors.^[6] According to Jon Hamilton, "A lot of what scientists know about parental bonding and the brain comes from studies of children who spent time in Romanian orphanages during the 1980s and 1990s."^[16] The conditions of the orphanages showed that not only is nutrition vital to a child's development, but also basic human contact. Due to lack of human contact, babies developed without stimulation, which led to self stimulation such as hand flapping or rocking back and forth. With these characteristics, children were often misdiagnosed to have mental disabilities and forced to move to another institution. They were also given psychiatric medication to treat their behaviors, or they were tied to their beds to prevent self-harm.^[17]

Even after being adopted, children had problems forming attachments to their new parents. When testing the children's responses in comparison to other children, scientists monitored their brain responses to seeing their adoptive mothers or an unfamiliar woman. The results, according to scientist Nim Tottenham, state, "The amygdala signal was not discriminating Mom from strangers."^[16] According to other MRI studies, children who grew up in Romanian orphanages had physically smaller brains than average children who developed properly.^[16]

According to attachment theory, "The most important tenet of attachment theory is that an infant needs to develop a relationship with at least one primary caregiver for the child's successful social and emotional development, and in particular for learning how to effectively regulate their feelings." In the Romanian orphanages, children had grown accustomed to neglect in early infancy.^[16] Because of the struggle to form emotional attachment to others, such as adoptive parents, children had trouble adapting to their new lives after being adopted………..

From Rasa personal experience:

I found a dead Mother opossum on the side of the road.  I examined her & there were babies – some dead, some alive. I took the living ones under my care, placing them in a loose cotton garment around my middle – where there was contact with my skin.  I fed them with an eye dropper.  After a while they wouldn’t stay in the bag, they insisted on climbing into my scalp & clinging to my hair, where I knew they would eliminate their waste.  I put them in a box & fed them with an eye dropper, but soon, they would not eat & they both died.

I was mystified but after years of thought I suspect they needed the physical closeness of a larger mammal to themselves, to give them the security & emotional support – without which they lost their appetite & could no longer feed.

I compare this to orphaned babies which were never held –

 “In the United States, 1944, an experiment was conducted on 40 newborn infants to determine whether individuals could thrive alone on basic physiological needs without affection. ... The experiment was halted after four months, by which time, at least half of the babies had died at that point.”

Rasa says:  I also compare this to young people, teens, adults & least of all, older folks.  Humans – especially when they are young – need physical contact.  Most kids are given contact up to a certain age, but when they enter teens are not held.  These young people need affection acutely.  We will encourage shows of affection among the young.  And it does not disappear, the need for touch may go well into old age, for some older folks, especially women, it can be tolerated without distress.  But bear in mind that it is often, in a Matriarchy, the older women hold & care for children – so they are getting affectionate warmth & touch there.  What happens to old men?  They often become child abusers as they want touch & cannot touch without sexual desires – keep them away from children.  Let them fend for themselves if they can’t find a woman for sex.  It is not our task here to take care of them.

My point is that the infants & children of the Members of our Order will have the most superb care there is, emotionally, physically & nutritionally.  And what is the role of men in this?  Non existent except in a few cases where a biological Dad actually loves his wife & kids.  Even if a Dad is far from ideal, his small contribution can mean a lot to a child in the absence of anything else {besides the Mom.}  They say children need a village.  Indeed, we will have such villages with Matriarchs.  {end}