Tuesday, 30 September 2025
Monday, 29 September 2025
Sunday, 28 September 2025
FREAK SHOW ADDENDUM
addendum to Jean Paul Goude article on he saw me part of his FREAK SHOW
Addendum: Just now took a look at what is
available of his early work. Saw many designs not seen before.
In some pictures he’s got the woman as a giant while he’s a small or even tiny man. Or he’s snuggled to a woman like an infant. OK, this is the Giantess fetish – this goes along with all the other things I said. He’s trying to create the Amazon, the ‘Mommy Fearest’ if you will. The ultimate memory of most submissive guys {men who get turned on by dominant women} is unconsciously, the memory of their mother. That is why violence sometimes gets into it – as Mom was a disciplinarian. He was small, she was big, so she could be frightening, plus the biggest fear could be withdrawal of love.
William
Bond explains how so many subs want ferocity from the female. They exaggerate
who & what Mom was – to make it more exciting. Why would they want to
recreate this environment? Lol, it’s quite obvious. They were comfortable there,
they were loved. Although Mom yelled at him, sometimes hit or punished, she
nevertheless provided a place of security & love, & so, the dominating
aspect with its punishment reminds them not so much the pain, but the love –
the security.
You see
with most of the woman he’s trying so hard to make the woman dominant he turns
her into ‘a man’. He did this with me - & even moreso, Grace Jones. Grace
Jones was putty in his hands, he was her Pygmalion. She let him do whatever he
wanted as it benefited her career, so she was turned into a He-Woman or
She-man. He took a normal woman, gave her a flat-top {crewcut}, made her snarl
or growl with a cigarette in her mouth – turned her into a menace with a puffed
out shoulder padded jacket, weapon in her hands – men groveling or worshipping
at her feet,& this progressed into movie roles.
This was not the woman at heart but a character
created by Jean Paul Goude. I call it ‘Mommy Fearest’ after my own Mom who was
not only mean but cruel. With me it’s not a fetish, just a fact of life that
was - which I wish I could laugh at. It doesn’t give me comfort.
Mother
God is there anything more to say about this? Any last words? Like what his
fetish specifically had to do with molding me, in his vision into a weight
lifting woman?
MG: Just
be grateful things worked out right for the time. You were doing weights - you
appeared in a magazine while he looked for such a woman. You were the woman.
You did the articles, they got female body building started – the rest is
history & one big feather in your cap. Mother God couldn’t have done it
without you & goodnight, Charlene, lol.
{End}
evocoteur MOVIE I'M IN-CRAZED MORTON DOWNEY LOL
the movie re Morton Downey Jr - I'm in it quite a big spot
https://www.tvguide.com/videos/evocateur-the-morton-downey-jr-movie/2030299299/evocateur-the-morton-downey-jr-movie/3558961/
Saturday, 27 September 2025
JUST PART OF HIS 'FREAK - 'GEEK' SHOW
9-26-25 He was my enemy – so he thinks
Unusual symbol. A person appears to me who is under a small table - the table draped with a large black cloth covering his entire body. {The table is about 4’ x 2’}
He I thinks this way because of being my enemy. I was working on a project someone was interfering with under a false name, so I thought it was this person.
I want to take a look who is this man. So I take the hem of the cloth on the left, & begin to lift it. I vaguely see a telephone with a winding cord {old fashioned} {indicates long ago subject} – sort of colorless & behind it some other items can’t recall what.
But he is SO FRIGHTENED I’ll find out who he is –– that he runs with all his might to the right, instantly disappearing. {End}
MEANING:
*{This is Jean-Paule Goude, who I wrote to via his website asking for permission to use pictures from Esquire & Playboy {which he produced – re the female body buiding.}
His reaction to me is one of FEAR. In his mind HE WAS MY ENEMY & today he fears I understand the truth – how he looked at me & others the way he portrayed us at that time.
I will summon Mother God to explain better than I can what the situation was & is:
Mother God: He looked at you aa a THING – as OBJECTS the way a man perceives a woman by the size of her breasts or buns or hair color or weight or whatever his fetish is.
He told you about how his fetish developed. His Mom took him to a circus when he was 10 – they came upon a CAGE where a WILD MAN painted brown, rattled the bars screamed, ate raw meat – maybe a live chicken – to scare the customers.
GEEK:
From the low German geck, meaning “fool” (1914).
A carnival performer often billed as a wild man whose act usually includes biting the head off of a live chicken or snake.
{Jean Paul was scared alright but it also created a FETISH where this sort of titillation got hooked with sexuality.
Then later on he saw BLACK WOMEN {Grace Jones & others before her} as the most sexually exciting – ‘Amazonian’ {yourself} as ditto – he could not find a black female body builder – there were none – you were the only pick of the crop, second best but you sufficed.
He turned your ‘fitness’ beauty into a lampoon of sorts – all his creation of blacks, Puerto Ricans & you the ‘Amazon’ were caricatures of THE GEEK – the scary powerful, unpredictable WILD MAN or woman THAT BELONGS IN A CAGE but at the same time EXCITES ONE. He got them ‘out of their cages’, took images & later in ‘Jungle Fever’ he put Grace Jones back into her cage naked & growling.
There was more: foot tall shoes to make his black gf look gigantic, intimidating, partying with his gay & straight elite 'artsy fartsy' friends. He made SCARS to paste to her face for FEROCITY. He took black boxer twins, had them wear foppish clothes for a laugh. Everyone dark or ethnic was a target - I was one of the very few white women chosen because I fit the 'Amazon' idea - flexing muscles for a woman MAINSTREAM was uneard of, like taking the BEARDED LADY out of the circus. If you can find it - maybe used - get his book JUNGLE FEVER which duplicates this work - work he now wants to forget because look on his website - it's top heavy with billionaires & elite products/subjects starting with Chanel.
From the Internet re Geeks or ‘wild men’ - Caught Looking Rachel Adams
The wild man was a stock sideshow personality, along with other common types such as fat ladies, tattooed people, giants, and midgets. During the period of their greatest popularity (roughly 1840-1940), freak shows consistently trafficked in representations of people of color that combined pedagogy and entertainment, pseudoscientific jargon, and fantastic hyperbole. In doing so, they offered simplified answers to the pressing concerns about race that would have preoccupied their predominantly white audiences, already anxious about slavery and its aftermath, the great waves of seemingly inassimilable immigrants, and imperial expansion. Freak show savages offered a simple equation of race with monstrous bodily deviance. As the black body in front of them was transformed into a hypervisible spectacle, audience members could believe that they in turn blended together into a transparent, homogenous whiteness. Those most anxious about their own status as citizens applauded the reassuring vision of nonwhite bodies that absolutely could not be assimilated. {End internet}
Look at the early work of Goude – his time with you. Little of it is displayed in his present website. This day he has Chanel & Big Top companies represented – the elites – who became the subjects of his art.
No more Geeks – no more early/freaky female body buliding etc.
He’s more or less erased his early work – including you – because there’s too much ‘obvious’ in it – the world got wise to using others as objects. We’re talking a woman popping ping pong balls out of her vagina, we’re talking a death mask of Sonny Liston emphasizing his thick lips & extreme back features, or Toukie, his black gf – her rear end exaggerated by a plaster cast that made it stick out 2 feet - {She left him because of that!}
When Jean Paul Goude used you as his ‘Amazon’ freak – it was a farce, a joke of sorts putting a beautiful feminine woman into a masculine, manly model doing all the muscle poses men do. You felt strange hitting some of those sets – like it was RIDICULE – but you kept going because it was something you had to do – your BELIEVED in the woman’s RIGHT to flex muscles just as men did - to appear that way on stage & to receive prizes & recognition the way males did.
That was LOST on Jean Paul Goude. Female body building DID NOT EXIST – this was a parody no more. But the PUBLIC didn’t take it that way & the article itself did not make fun of you - the author praised you & showed you in a positive light – the layout meant to be CAMP turned into a CATALYST for female body building, the beginning, which you would push further until it stuck by getting it into Playboy – vhallah – {Playboy AGAIN used it a a PARODY – not something serious – a joke to make fun of PUMPING IRON & Arnold Schwarzeneggar.}
But IN SPITE OF their intent, it did not turn out that way. People took it seriously & they began to hold contests.
Neither Esquire nor Playboy nor Jean Paul Goude intended this work to bring about legitimate female body building– but the Almighty – who chose you & spurned you on – did – God works in mysterious ways.
Consider ten years later - 1985 - you called the editor of Esquire & said it as the anniversarry of female body building, they could do a retrospect - his answer was "We're not as HUMOROUS as we used to be." This PROVES they saw it AS A JOKE. {Mother God did not, tricked them into doing this which She knew would lead to empowerment of women & subsequent, eventuaqlly, Matriarchy.}
Oh now you ask, why does Jean Paul Goude consider himself your enemy & does NOT want to speak to you {the phone under the black cloth representing communication.}
Because he doesn’t want to be KNOWN that way – for what he did; For using you & others as objects & not only you as a woman, masquerading what to him was ‘a man’ but how he treated blacks & Puerto Ricans. This could be seen as discrimination – using people to make money for ‘freak shows’ or disguised in his case, as ‘graphic art.’
And speaking of which – he did not even PAY you for the article – you did it in exchange for the publicity. But you did not resent this - you thought of Jean Paul & always have, as your hero – you did not feel he ‘used’ you – but the world might think different, that’s what he wants TO HIDE!
He does not want to face all of this – he wants to be hidden under that cloth – he wants to run away from you & his querulous past. His art might not be as welcome today as it was in the 70's - it might be labeled RACIST & EXPLOITATIVE. {End}
Another Great Esoteric Video About Mary Magdalene, The 13th Apostle
Another great esoteric video about Mary Magdalene, the 13th Apostle:
Friday, 26 September 2025
KELLIE ONE OF HIS FREAK SHOWS
Kellie was one of his FREAK SHOWS: Jean Paul Goude
http://embodimentofgod.com/college-of-the-gender-war/he-saw-it-as-one-of-his-freak-shows/
that's how he saw it, what Esquire was doing
Thursday, 25 September 2025
Wednesday, 24 September 2025
Tuesday, 23 September 2025
Monday, 22 September 2025
Sunday, 21 September 2025
Humor (Updated)
Apparently, old Yahweh once had a wife, Asherah. More like, Asherah had a trophy husband, since she was much older than him. Like literally thousands of years older.
First, God created man. Then SHE had a better idea.
Forget the Golden Calf, it's the Golden PHALLUS that the patriarchy really worships.
Supposedly the Y-chromosome is deteriorating with each generation of men. So a few thousand years from now, there may not be any more men. In other words, men will eventually go the way of the dildo...er...dodo.
Where will the men of the future work? At the department of redundancy department.
What political office would the men of the future hold? Secretary of the Inferior, of course.
Hey, wanna hear a joke? MEN. That's the joke.
The old "two lanes or four" joke likely has a more esoteric meaning. That is, women tend to use "four-valued logic" while men tend to use "two-valued logic". Because women think on a higher level than men.
If a man speaks, and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
Men don't drive their cars. They AIM them. Problem is, their aim is NOT always good--just like when they pee.
How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One--he just holds it there and waits for the world to revolve around him. And then he brags about the screwing, of course.
Plenty of men don't have midlife crises, because they are stuck in perpetual adolescence.
A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde all find a magic lamp and a genie pops out, offering them each one wish. But the catch was that they would each lose 10 IQ points. So they agreed and the wishes were granted. The brunette became a redhead, the redhead became a blonde, and the blonde became a man.
The best advice men can give to women is, "don't be like us". The best advice anyone can give to men is, "think with your "third eye", not your "third leg"".
Looks like John Lennon was a terrible speller. It should be, Woman is the NINJA of the world.
There was once a time when cats were worshipped. Later on, there was a time when they were vilified and even burned alive during the Dark Ages. And now, the pendulum is swinging back towards worship once again. I think we realize by now that we're not really talking about cats.
Patriarchy is the ultimate PHALLUSY.
The War on Women has been going on for about 7000 years now. We just call it "patriarchy" to make it sound nicer. And it needs to end, yesterday.
"When men ruled the world, it was called the Dark Ages" -- Bumper sticker from the year 2100 (if we don't all go extinct in the meantime)
MAN: "You know, honey, we did win practically every battle for the past 7000 years".
WOMAN: "Yes, I know, dear. And it's also irrelevant."
MATRIARCHAL PICK-UP LINES:
How does it feel to know the future belongs to you? Because I wouldn't know anything about that.
How does it feel to be part of the better half of humanity? Because I wouldn't know anything about that.
Nice T-shirt. You should have another one that says "This is what perfection looks like". Because it's true.
As Secretary of the Inferior, I approve!
IF I WERE THE DEVIL:
If I were the Devil, I would know that no sane person would ever knowingly and willingly worship me directly, so I would create an alter ego of myself, one that claims to strongly dislike me. I would trick the people into worshipping him, while in reality they are worshipping me without realizing it. He (I) would usurp and supplant the Goddess that the people originally worshipped for millennia. I would have the people commit horrific and brutal human sacrifices in his (really, my) name--war, genocide, gynocide, ecocide, and stuff like that. And I would call him--wait for it--JEHOVAH! (Makes the Dr. Evil gesture) Bwahahaha!
By thus deifying men, I would then convince the fellas that they are the superior gender and that women are mere adjuncts to male privilege. I will have them remove women from power and install themselves in their place. I will make them warlike and brutal, devoid of empathy, and they will think nothing of beating, raping, enslaving, torturing, and killing women and children. Then they will conquer other lands, spreading this new disease worldwide. I will call this new system/disease--wait for it--PATRIARCHY! That would make the War on Women sound a bit nicer. Its fruit shall include capitalism, imperialism, militarism, feudalism, fascism, racism, rape, plunder, genocide, gynocide, ecocide, and all that other fun stuff. (twirls mustache and goatee) Bwahahaha!
In the fourteenth and fifteenth centuries, women will mount their first major challenge to my diabolical system. They will attempt to overthrow it, but I will quash it with a brutal counterrevolution of my own. The Inquisition and Burning Times, if you will. I will use divide-and-conquer and the power of patriarchal religion to do so. Men will commit unspeakable acts of violence against women, rob them of their resources and knowledge, and eventually women would start pointing the finger at each other as well, sabotaging any sort of chance at a real sisterhood. That would pave the way for my very favorite brainchild of all--wait for it--CAPITALISM. For the next 500 years, the world will become hopelessly addicted to growth for the sake of growth, the ideology of the cancer cell (which eventually kills its host, by the way). Bwahahaha!
Fast forward to the early 1980s--I will create a dubious moral panic in my very own name. The "Satanic Panic", if you will. Not only would that distract the masses from my most faithful servant, Ronald Wilson Reagan (666), but it would divide and conquer the feminist movement right at a critical time when women seem to be winning the 7000 year battle of the sexes. The second wave of feminism will then self-destruct and collapse. (I did not predict the third wave would be so potent, though, let alone the fourth wave and beyond!)
And now in the 2020s, I see that women are winning once again. People are falling away from my faith in droves these days. Patriarchy is self-destructing, as is capitalism and empire in general. So I must redouble my efforts. It is only a matter of time before women take over once again. Hopefully with the help of the reincarnation of Nero and his false prophets, I can start WWIII in the meantime before that happens, and perhaps destroy the entire planet. Anything to keep those pesky women from ever taking over again! Bwahahaha!
THIS FLAG:
Will be flown upside-down (nation in distress):
Until THIS FLAG:
Is flown right-side up!
Saturday, 20 September 2025
Friday, 19 September 2025
The Menopause Of Humanity
Or, "Fewer Babies, More Wisdom"
By Ajax the Great (Pete Jackson)
(Originally posted on the Vive La Difference! blog)
Menopause. Love it or hate it, everyone knows what it is, with the degree to which we know it ranging from vaguely to rather intimately. And rarely does anyone ever use it as a metaphor for anything, much less anything positive given how negatively-colored the "change of life" has all too often been cast under patriarchy.Help a Sister re Male Abuse of Daughter
http://embodimentofgod.com/college-of-matriarchal-love/help-a-sister-re-male-abuse-other-issues/
9-19-25
New Church People Run Away – Review Past Dreams
Start with the end of the dream. {The beginning escapes me just now.} I am at the back of my house or ‘Church Offices’ – {luckily there because he came to tell me something important} –my best work friend comes to the back door to tell me,
“They have closed the Church.”
Yiikes, this is bad news. We
were about to open the new Church! I must rush over there, see what happened.
My friend is wearing a
full-length beige wool tailored coat of soft material.
In my back yard there is a
black iron security fence, about 10’ tall with spikes on top.
We go around to the side &
it’s the same fence & the gate isn’t closed. I was going to leave it open
as no one ever bothers us – but in view of this dramatic turn we agree, better
close the gate.
We get to the area where the
Church is. It’s one of those brick
staircases on both sides, coming to a landing & there is the front door.
Several people surround me
here on the street, all listening to me. I am crouching on the pavement with
the friends surrounding me - 4 or 5 people. To the left is a long line of
people - 75 or more – waiting to enter the Church to hear our firt sermon.
I said several things but the
last thing I said was,
“Are you going to continue to allow them to rape us?”
And at that everyone leaves
QUICKLY – the friends around me exit left along with the multitude waiting, all
depart together & I am ALONE.
I get my bearings – it takes a
minute – then I intend to rush down the street after the crowd. The street seems
to go slightly downward. I see the last of them turn a corner left – then they
are gone. I seem to see my ‘best friend’ with the beige coat at the end. {This
is vague.}
Before I hit this ‘last
street’ I notice a black man enter a building stairs to the left. He’s
elegantly dressed, I surmise he’s a Priest but different than most. He has on a
‘sombrero’ of sorts, a very wide straight brimmed hat, dark with a light
border, an elegant black suit tight at the waist, maybe slightly flared from
the waist - pencil thin pants. Quite a presentation. At first I just walk past,
then rethink myself & peruse,
“Let me go up there to this
man’s premises – maybe he’ll accept my Church & help somehow.”
The thought I got from those
who left was,
“They don’t want anything new
or unusual in their religion.”
So as I ascend the stairs I
come to a room & do not see the Priest, but two regularly dressed men {are
they black?} Their skin is not dark but they might be mixed race – both have
very short hair like old-fashioned crewcuts & grey regular suits &
they’re standing facing one wall, all glass picture windows, another wall to
their right all glass windows.
As I approach them I say
something like,
“I have tried to open up a new
Church but the people won’t accept me because I used to be a stripper, among
other things.”
My hope is that these people,
being black, have suffered prejudice also & will understand – however –
this is not proven yet as I don’t see their reaction, the dream ends.
Beginning of dream:
I’m at my front guest room
window with a lady friend to my left. Outsdide it’s real cold – we see a man
with others around him & there are the two dogs of this lady, one bigger
one smaller.
Both dogs have on clothing,
pants & tops. The man is bending forward over the smaller dog &
removing his pants. My lady friend cries out,
“It’s cold! The dog will be
cold! Tell him not to remove his pants!”
She is asking me to help – not
sure why it’s my duty to help, but I immediately comply. I try to open the
window so I can call to him but when I pull it up on the left side the frame
slips off the pane of glass, so I cannot open it. I then try with the right
side & manage to open the window.
I call to the man,
“Henry, Henry don’t take the
dog’ pants off. He will be cold.”
I then see Henry & his
male friend have appeared to my extreme right instead of left & he hears
me. {End}
MEANING:
*{Yesterday I gave a copy of the book “Woman, Thou Art
God” to a lady friend of mine who’s having a dilemma concerning her ex husband.
There is a chance he is abusing one or both of their daughters {ages 10 &
12} as they stay with him during joint custody – 3-4 days a week. They are with
him ALL ALONE in his house over night & we are both aware of the danger of
this, neither of us felt good about it.
I prayed for her & the
girls on & off all night.
The dream is saying
luckily, that he’s not done it yet. It was suspected he was GROOMING the 10
year old due to his behavior with her. Yes, he is PLANNING it this dream says.
It’s symbolized by my calling him ‘Henry.’ My Uncle Henry was PLANNING to rape
me & took me on a drive into the country & kept slowing down at
deserted country roads – but he changed his mind {due to probably my Guardian
Angel} & didn’t do it. So this is a sigh of relief – he’s not yet done it.
And I have a hunch the man
standing with him when I call out to him – he finally hears me, is his Guardian
Angel & because of this Angel, he has changed his mind about the abuse. The
Angel caused him TO HEAR ME or with my prayers the energy/thought reached him
‘don’t take her pants off.’
The window – at first I
can’t open the window because he is to the ‘left’ means he’s thinking with the
‘left side’ or wrong way. But then he finally does hear me, his Guardian Angel
next to him he’s on the RIGHT side. And my lady friend told me the story which
summoned my help automatically.
The part re the Church is
also from the POV or
mental/emotional state of my lady friend. She feels ALL ALONE & rather
helpless – even her best friend has deserted her. Her ‘new religion’ is that
women want to top the rape – rape of themselves & their children. But
society isn’t about that – it’s patriarchal & has its POV which is more the side of men than
women.
My friend – let’s call her
Linda – feels helpless & all alone. Her ‘best friend’ could be the husband
we’re talking about who was once her friend, acted like a friend because she
had this problem with another man in the past – but after all, he does not
support her – he supposedly had sympathy when she told him about the other guy,
now he’s becoming like the other guy.
And so Linda is deserted as
the court system is antagonistic to women - certainly not on their side, &
she has no hope of getting help from Patriarchs. But she sees a symbol of those
who have been scorned in the past – black people, & here is a black priest
& two black clergy she goes to meet. Maybe they will understand.
This might be her hope in
the New Religion, the book I gave her which outlines that we have to have our
own Zeitgeist, POV, perspective, lifestyle & rules. The black Priest would
be me – in all my glamour I am seen as ‘black’ or an outcast, in spite of the
hat I’m wearing which is ‘Woman of God – Priestess.’
When she sees the two clergy it could be my explaining of the past – like the guys with the old-fashioned crewcuts – when women one ruled the family & the world & we had Matriarchy – there is a vision one could think about {the picture windows in front & to the right of the men.} The fact there are two men could be the addition of friends Pete & William, both of whom are in the book collaborating with me – {the striking black Priest} – while their message is more from the mind {rather than representing my unusual glamour.}* {End}
A Few Days Ago the ‘Oscars’ with Skirts
I see someone receiving, from the trunk of a car, Oscars of
gold like the Academy Awards. They get one, then another & another until
there are about 30 of them.
They are unusual in that the
statuette is not a man but a woman as you can see a skirt, slightly draped over
his legs – just like 3 slight folds, all part of the gold statue.
MEANING:
*{This portents many movies / films / being created on my
life – all so good they win Oscars.}*
{End}
Further Back Dream
This
might have to do with an alteration in my daily prayers where I call upon the
saints on earth who love God along with all my other requests.
I’m in a building high up with
giant windows when I see something
outside in the sky which is prodigious & scary.
What looks like a flying
saucer & moves like one – darting at supersonic speed this way or that.
It’s like a geodosic dome, all those sides, but not glass, & it is round
& has all those flat surfaces that end up part of this round gizmo. But
it’s solid, opaque, a dark almost ‘colorless’ army green & has on some of
the surfaces horizontal lines, some other vague designs here & there, &
the entire thing is so phenomenal I shudder & am delighted at the same
time.
I ask one of the men running
this ‘flying machine’
“This is for our benefit isn’t
it”
more as a statement than a
question.
Then somehow I expand to the
earth or world & travel from this man, then that man, all part of the
‘military’ that presented this machine. I look for the most handsome ones, go
up to them & flirt. But I am not beautiful – just ordinary looking, & I
say to one of them,
“Even though I don’t look that
good, can I still be accepted?”
Each of the men was kind,
cordial, smiled or said kind thing to me. There was no rejection.
MEANING:
*{When I called out to the
saints on earth, they are the Church Militant - & they are the ones who can
be used as portals for the Saints in Heaven to reach down to souls in Purgatory
& they can also reach souls in Purgatory directy themselves like I do. It
is our calling or office.
Myself going to the most
handsome means those that are most Saintly & I consider myself less than
they are but want them to accept me.
Why the flying saucers? It
might be their supernatural ability to help others & they are teasing me
with their Power so to speak.
Their benevolent attitude toward me proves they are not flesh oriented – not men of the lower self but of God. They do not reject women based on how they look – that’s the proof of the pudding.}* {End}
I See my Guardian Angel
{one of them- I have three}
One day I was thinking of my
Guardian Angels a lot, how they are spirits & have no bodies & how
people try to imagine they look.
I see this most beautiful
person who seems 60% male. I knew him from long ago, say 50 years back, &
he looks just as young now as he did then. He has blonde hair that frames his
face, indenting in the middle of his head, falling dow past his ears & his
features are even & I tell him,
“You are just as beautiful now
as you were 50 years ago.”