Sunday 22 August 2021

Patriarchy Has A Kill Switch, And We Already Know What It Is

By Ajax the Great

(Originally posted on The Chalice and the Flame blog)


Author Yuri Alexandrovich wrote a great article recently for Medium, in which he articulates something that we all intuitively know (but often don't want to say out loud) about the patriarchy and how to end it.  After first establishing that patriarchy is inherently evil (and thus cannot be redeemed), he then goes on about what holds it all together.  This thing that holds the entire construct all together is its sine qua non and thus is it's own Achilles' heel, and that thing is control of female sexuality, and the primary tool used to control that is slut-shaming.  That is, the shaming of Women for expressing their sexuality in the way they choose.  And thus the "kill switch" is to put an end to the utterly backwards and outmoded practice of slut-shaming once and for all.

Wait, what?  There is still slut-shaming in 2021?  Absolutely.  It has diminished somewhat since the (largely male-defined) "sexual revolution" half a century ago, to be sure, but it is still there. The double standard still exists, and it has in fact become more of a double bind in which Women are expected to be "sexy" (as defined by males) but not sexual by their own definition.  And ending it is thus the unfinished business of both feminism and the real sexual revolution for Women.

(That's not the only double bind here, there is also the historical one in which Women are expected to both obey men as well as also be the "gatekeepers" of sex, with no way to opt out of either contradictory requirement.)

As Yuri Alexandrovich himself says:
So here is our kill switch: we stop telling women when, where and with whom she is allowed to get involved romantically. Her body, her choice. And she is perfectly capable of making it a responsible choice, thank you very much.
And lest anyone misunderstand his words, read too much into it, or try to put words in his mouth:
NOTE: This is not to suggest that anyone should change their own behavior. We do whatever we are comfortable with. That, of course, includes staying monogamous, still a perfectly valid choice. But it can not be justified as a moral choice anymore -- rather, it is a personal preference.
Female sexuality (or more accurately, female-defined sexuality) is an extremely powerful force to be reckoned with, which is why the patriarchy has gone out of its way to suppress it (and/or supplant it with male-defined sexuality).  As I have noted before, the suppression of Women's sexuality was not entirely about maintaining control over the male bloodline (though that was originally a major part of it), but more generally about power and control over Women directly, as well as over other men indirectly via artificial scarcity.

In a similar vein, patriarchy's favorite brainchild, capitalism, needs scarcity (whether real or artificial) to function.  That is how the oligarchs control the serfs.  And the kill switch of capitalism is thus to give it the one thing it cannot surivive--abundance.  The analogy should be apparent now.

Ending slut-shaming will not end patriarchy overnight, of course, but is nonetheless necessary for it to end sooner rather than later.  And if we wait until we return to full-blown Matriarchy before liberating Women's sexuality, we will never be ready, as Women's sexual liberation is a key step on the path to Matriarchy.  That is, if we make the perfect the enemy of the good, we ultimately end up with neither.

One thing needs to be clear.  As hard as we fight for the right to say "yes" to sex, we must also fight twice as hard for the right to say "NO" as well.  The LAST thing we want is for sex of any kind to be perceived as mandatory, so enthusiastic and mutual consent must be a precondition for all sexual acts, period. And that is true for both Women and men, by the way.  Also, we must be careful not to fall in the trap of the "reverse double standard" that has become in vogue in some circles these days (Oprah and Dr. Phil, I'm looking at YOU!), in which men are the ones vilified for their sexuality while Women are ignored (if not celebrated) for doing the same exact things.  Doing so is a sure path to a sort of "reverse patriarchy", not the Matriarchy proper that we should be aiming for.  The same goes for a "reverse double bind" as well.

Put simply:  Women should have the absolute right to be as sexual--or not--as they themselves want to be, without the need for justification or apology to anyone, period.

So what are we waiting for?  Kill Switch Engage!  Let the planetary healing begin!

6 comments:

  1. well done, Ajax, you are always right on point.

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  2. Indeed one of the Saints, Martin Luther King, Jr., in channeling, said to me that when women have achieved sexual liberty it will end Patriarchy. He said 'what will men fight for?' Like herd animals, any kind of herd from buffaloes to horses to cattle to goats to sheep to walruses....the Stallion or Beach Master fights off the other males & keeps his harem. But if the members of his harem decide to split & go any which way & consort with any male, he has no harem to defend. And therefore, no more fights, no more war. So Patriarchy & war ends with female sexual freedom. Dr. Bryan Sykes, of all people, emphasizes this point saying all men do fighting & wars for are to get the women - he cites all the warlords & their behavior like Genghis Kahn & the Pharaohs & othes, who had from hundreds to thousands of wives. It's all about sex, control of women. But people, besides us, don't see the big picture. So pity them. I guess it's up to us to educate them, they just can't see. So we keep meditating, studying, writing & promoting. What else can we do? It's great to have you here, Ajax, posting on this site. Since William hasn't been able to it's gone dead, now it's alive again, thank Goddess. And your articles are adding great value. I think William got tired of posting all my dreams, haha. Can't blame him. But that's what I was working on for a while.

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    1. Indeed, that is true. Thank you very much, Rasa :)

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